The most important thing I learned about my mother while sitting Shivah is that I did not know her.

I knew that she was involved in numerous projects, establishing a Bikur Cholim in Baltimore, helping abused women, building a day care center for developmentally challenged adults, teaching, outreach, counselor, creating the Ner Israel Service League that supports the Kollel, and a host of other projects. I knew enough to consider her a Chesed Hero and role model, but I still did not know even a small percentage of the projects she led or the people she helped.

I was envious as I watched my great nieces and nephews honor their parents and grandparents, fulfilling the Mitzvah of honoring parents, something I will never be able to fulfill again. I was heartbroken to realize that any honor I gave my mother was so much less than she deserved.

I observed her incredible devotion to her parents and tried to emulate her, but upon reflection I realize that her Kibud Av v’Eim was always an expression of Yirah, awe, of her parents, a quality terribly lacking in my Kibud Eim.

It’s too late now for me, but for those of you who still have parents, I share these thoughts so that you will never look back on your honor of your parents and experience what I now feel. Learn who they are and make your acts of honor an expression of more than just gratitude for giving you life. Treasure each opportunity to express honor powered by awe of the people you may not know as well as you think.

Author Info:
Learn & discover the Divine prophecies with Rabbi Simcha Weinberg from the holy Torah, Jewish Law, Mysticism, Kabbalah and Jewish Prophecies. The Foundation Stone™ is the ultimate resource for Jews, Judaism, Jewish Education, Jewish Spirituality & the holy Torah.

From Arise India Forum:

“For many years I worked in palliative care. My patients were those who had gone home to die. Some incredibly special times were shared. I was with them for the last three to twelve weeks of their lives

People grow a lot when they are faced with their own mortality. I learnt never to underestimate someone’s capacity for growth. Some changes were phenomenal. Each experienced a variety of emotions, as expected, denial, fear, anger, remorse, more denial and eventually acceptance. Every single patient found their peace before they departed though, every one of them.

When questioned about any regrets they had or anything they would do differently, common themes surfaced again and again. Here are the most common five:

1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

This was the most common regret of all. When people realise that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made.

It is very important to try and honour at least some of your dreams along the way. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom very few realise, until they no longer have it.

2. I wish I didn’t work so hard.

This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children’s youth and their partner’s companionship. Women also spoke of this regret. But as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.

By simplifying your lifestyle and making conscious choices along the way, it is possible to not need the income that you think you do. And by creating more space in your life, you become happier and more open to new opportunities, ones more suited to your new lifestyle.

3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.

Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.

We cannot control the reactions of others. However, although people may initially react when you change the way you are by speaking honestly, in the end it raises the relationship to a whole new and healthier level. Either that or it releases the unhealthy relationship from your life. Either way, you win.

4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

Often they would not truly realise the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.

It is common for anyone in a busy lifestyle to let friendships slip. But when you are faced with your approaching death, the physical details of life fall away. People do want to get their financial affairs in order if possible. But it is not money or status that holds the true importance for them. They want to get things in order more for the benefit of those they love. Usually though, they are too ill and weary to ever manage this task. It is all comes down to love and relationships in the end. That is all that remains in the final weeks, love and relationships.

5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realise until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called ‘comfort’ of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content. When deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again.

When you are on your deathbed, what others think of you is a long way from your mind. How wonderful to be able to let go and smile again, long before you are dying.

Kelly Oxford: http://kellyoxford.tumblr.com/post/14958669440/nurse-reveals-top-5-regrets-of-the-dying

We have far more that unites us than separates us. If we focus on this, there is no force either within or without our society that can defeat us.

On balance, Israeli society is extremely healthy.

Unemployment is at record lows. At a time of global recession, the Israeli economy is growing steadily.

Israeli Jewish women have the highest fertility rate in the Western world with an average of three children per woman. Education levels have risen dramatically across the board over the past decade with dozens of private colleges opening their doors to more and more sectors of the population.

Israel’s diverse Jewish population is becoming more integrated. Sephardic and Ashkenazi intermarriage has long been a norm. Secular Jews are becoming more religious. A new educational trend that received significant media attention in recent months involves secular parents who send their children to national religious schools to ensure that they receive strong educational grounding in Judaism.

And as secular Jews become more religious, both the national religious and ultra-Orthodox sectors are becoming increasingly integrated in nonreligious neighborhoods and institutions. Ultra-Orthodox conscription rates have increased seven-fold in the past four years. In 2010, 50 percent of ultra-Orthodox male highschool graduates were conscripted.

The IDF assesses that by 2015, the rate of conscription will rise to 65%.

While this is still below the general conscription rate of 75% among male 18-year-olds, the rapid rise in ultra- Orthodox military service is a revolutionary development for the sector.

With military service comes entrée to the job market. The trend towards employment integration was blazed by ultra-Orthodox women. Over the past decade, ultra-Orthodox women have matriculated en masse in vocational schools that have trained them in hi-tech and other marketable professions and so enabled them to raise their families out of poverty.

These ultra-Orthodox women, who are now being followed by their IDF veteran husbands, are part of a general trend that has seen women fully integrated in almost every sector of society and the economy. The fact that women make up the senior leadership echelons in both business and government is not a fluke. Rather it is a product of the largely egalitarian nature of Israeli society.

True, as is the case everywhere, Israeli women suffer from male chauvinism.

And like the rest of the world, Israel has its share of sexual abusers, rapists, and criminal and social misogynists. But imperfection does not detract from the fact that women in Israel are free, educated, empowered and advancing on all fronts.

As for the national religious community, its youth remain committed to serving as pioneers in strengthening Israel as a Jewish democracy. Not content to limit themselves to national religious communities in Judea and Samaria, more and more young national religious families are moving to poor towns and communities from Dimona to Ramle to Kiryat Shmona to strengthen their educational, economic and social underpinnings.

Modern Orthodox women are taking on expanded roles in religious councils, synagogues, religious courts and other bodies. Soldiers from the national religious sector remain overrepresented in all IDF combat units and in the officer corps.

Israel’s growing social cohesion and prosperity is all the more notable as we witness neighboring states aflame with rebellion and revolution, extremist Islamist forces voted to power from Morocco to Egypt and economic forecasts promising mass privation.

And in the Age of Obama, with cleavages between liberals and conservatives growing ever wider in America, and with the future of the European Union hanging in the balance as the euro zone teeters on the edge of an abyss, the fact that Israeli society is becoming increasingly fortified is simply extraordinary.

In light of these integrationist trends, the media circus in recent weeks that has portrayed Israeli society as frayed through and through has been startling. With women in Israel presented as underprivileged victims, national religious youth presented as terrorists and the ultra-Orthodox community presented as a gang of misogynist, violent crazies set to transform Israel – in the words of US Secretary of State Hillary Clinton – into another Iran, an average news consumer can be forgiven for wondering how he missed his country’s demise.

What explains this sudden flood of gloom and doom stories? Certainly it is true that in a highly competitive news environment, media coverage tends to over represent marginal social forces. Sensational stories make for banner headlines. And it is at the margins of society that a reporter is most likely to find sensational stories.

So it is that when reporters wish to push a socialist agenda, they descend on urban slums and talk to people hanging out on the street doing nothing. As a rule, these stories will not feature visits to vocational training schools that are educating poor people out of poverty.

Just as poor, uneducated single mothers in Lod can be depended on to blame their troubles on an insensitive government, so groups of ultra- Orthodox extremists in Beit Shemesh, whose own communities decry them, can be trusted to treat nonreligious women poorly.

None of this is to say that we should stand by and allow poor single moms and their children to go hungry or that we should accept abuse of women by ultra-Orthodox bullies. The former is an issue for social services. The latter is an issue for law enforcement bodies. And to the extent that these institutions are failing in their missions, they should be required to improve their performance.

But just the majority of single mothers, who are not impoverished, don’t deserve to be placed in the victim column, so, too, the majority of ultra-Orthodox Israelis do not deserve to have their reputation besmirched because of the bad behavior of a small, vocal and easily provoked minority.

ALL OF this brings us to the issue at hand. Stories highlighting the deviant behaviors of marginal social forces tend to be simplistic and misleading, and to serve identifiable political forces. And so, with our national discourse suddenly dominated by stories describing the demise of Israeli democracy, women’s rights and the rule of law at the hands of modern and ultra- Orthodox Jews, we need to consider who benefits from the stories.

It is notable that the seam lines being opened by all of the stories, which are again, about deviations from the norm of Israel’s social cohesion, all fall within the governing coalition. Stories of “Jewish terrorists” set the security hawks against the ideological hawks. They set the likes of Defense Minister Ehud Barak and his supporters against the Jewish communities in Judea and Samaria and their representatives in the Likud, Israel Beiteinu, Habayit Hayehudi and other coalition parties.

Stories about ultra-Orthodox misogynists make it politically costly for the Likud and Israel Beiteinu to sit in the same government as ultra- Orthodox parties such as Shas and United Torah Judaism. They also serve to weaken Shas among its nonultra- Orthodox voters. The fact that the ultra-Orthodox bus lines were inaugurated with the support of the Kadima government in 2007 is beside the point. It is the Likud that is now being blamed for their existence.

The current media-supported outcries against the national religious and ultra-Orthodox sectors follow the pattern of last summer’s social justice protests in Tel Aviv. The purpose of those protests was to discredit the government in the eyes of working class voters and young people.

The current protests also follow in the footsteps of the protests of 1998 and 1999 that brought down Prime Minister Binyamin Netanyahu’s first government. Those protests pitted his Russian immigrant coalition members against Shas. They pitted secular Israelis against his ultra-Orthodox coalition members. They alienated young voters from his leadership.

They set his socialist partners against his capitalist partners.

The cleavages wrought in Netanyahu’s coalition made members of his own party as well as his coalition partners fear the electoral cost of maintaining their membership in his government. And so one by one, they bolted his government until it finally fell.

Notably, many of the same forces – from the New Israel Fund to various political consultants who work for the Israeli Left to European NGOs – who were active in the protests in 1999 and in the social justice protests last summer are also playing a role in the current protests. The New Israel Fund raised NIS 200,000 in “emergency funds” to pay for buses to transport protesters to Beit Shemesh last week.

It also paid for two rallies in Jerusalem attacking religious bans on female vocalists earlier last month.

Last summer, Israel’s New Left movement led by leftist political consultant Eldad Yaniv took credit for organizing the anti-free market protests. Yaniv and his colleagues were assisted in conceptualizing the protests by US Democratic pollster Stanley Greenberg, who was also the architect of the social protests in 1998-99.

Indications of how the political Left has been impacted by the current wave of demonstrations are mixed. A Shvakim Panorama poll from last week, which posited the existence of a new anti-religious party led by popular television personality Yair Lapid and a new anti-capitalist Sephardic party led by former Shas leader Arye Deri, indicated that the Left as a whole has been strengthened against the Right. While Kadima would lose most of its Knesset seats to Lapid’s party, it is Deri who would be the undoing of the Right.

The poll claimed that Deri, who since his release from prison has strengthened his bonafides as a secular- friendly political dove, would win seven mandates. Shas would drop from its current 11 seats to five. Deri’s rise would decrease the political Right in all its various forms from its current 67-seat majority in the 120 seat Knesset to a minority of 57.

The media have trumpeted this poll as the first harbinger of spring for Israel’s political Left. And certainly it provides some reason for celebration among leftist political forces. Like the protests in the late 1990s, and like last summer’s anti-capitalist protests, the current batch of anti-religious campaigns serves to turn Israeli against Israeli by feeding on and inflaming sectoral envies and insecurities. And given their success, we can certainly expect them to continue.

For the benefit of society as a whole, we must hope that the basic health and cohesion of Israeli society that has grown so miraculously over the past decade will prevail in the current contest. We have far more that unites us than separates us. If we focus on this, there is no force either within or without our society that can defeat us.

But if we give in to the forces of contention and chaos, we risk endangering everything we hold dear.



caroline@carolineglick.com

Excitement was reigning in the faces of thousands of people waiting for 2011 to be over. 10, 9 8 ….. 1 Happy New Year!!!!! All wishing each other the best, hopes and dreams to be hopefully realized in this coming year.  People hugged, smiled, shouted, felt united with strangers in Times Square to be able to shout together the new year’s welcome.

I was watching the scene on tv and felt like an outsider. Why were people so excited?   I had no doubt that the mutual good wishes were certainly real. But then I realized that the wishing was hopeful wishing. Almost like seating in front of a roulette expecting that, yes, this will be my turn to be lucky.  And then, in contrast to our Rosh Hashana, I was struck by the shattering difference.  We have a day of judgement in which what we do matters. The behavior is dependent on our actions. The ultimate “ein mazal b’israel”. That we are masters of our own destiny as opposed to be just recipients of the mazal. We can be raised above the mazal to shape our own.  

The other side of the coin in this active shaping of our own destiny is responsibility and understanding we shape our life with our choices.

So on that note, I wish you an enlightened solar 2012 year of choices that will make us better human beings.

Written by Debbie Isaacman

Dancing with the Stars is one of my favorite shows! I look forward to watching the

glitzy and dazzling costumes, the music which moves us to feel such a wide range of emotions from the quick paced rhythmic beats to the lyrical flow of music used for the waltz. Then of course there are the dancers themselves who come on stage every week and rise to the challenge of performing. The competition has the potential to facilitate not only the progress of dancing technique but also the personal growth and development of the contestants themselves!

From the moment one particular contestant took to the stage, he won my heart and that of many others as well. He was not your conventionally “handsome” celebrity but by virtue of the fact that he was a participant in this competion, showed that he had a winning combination of courage and charisma that was going to take him far. Not many people with a severely distorted and scared face would feel confident walking onto a dance-floor where their “unconventional” physical features would be seen by millions. JR Martinez had been a soldier who was involved in a landmine explosion while in Iraq. His injuries were very severe and it was not clear if he would make it. He did survive but in many ways he wished that he hadn’t after he saw what his face and body looked like.

I could identify with JR’s struggle as I too have a somewhat “unique physical appearance difference.” I was born with the radius bone missing in each of my arms, making my forearms somewhat smaller than everybody else’s. My doctor told me if you are to miss a bone, the radius is the way to go as it does not connect to the elbow which thankfully gives me the flexibility of movement and allows me to be completely functional. It has been pretty challenging going through life looking distinctly different especially in a world where beauty is a very sought after commodity. Many women will go to extraordinary lengths to achieve this state of beauty including having plastic surgeries and Botox treatment to ensure their physical beauty stays in tact. This preoccupation with physical beauty has a history going back to ancient times.

The Ancient Greeks or Hellenists, the protagonists in the Chanukah story, put great emphasis on the body and physical perfection. They were the ones who created the Olympic Games which was an arena to celebrate the human form and its accomplishments. One’s worth in this culture was dependent on outside appearance and physical form which by its nature is temporary and as such will eventually disappear. The Ancient Greeks did not learn the lesson that Jewish wisdom has always taught which is that beauty is not what you look like on the outside but who you choose to develop yourself to be from the inside. JR Martinez made a choice not to be defined by his physical appearance but rather it is through his courage, determination and fighting spirit that a special kind of beauty radiates.

We all go through life as soldiers fighting the toughest war of all and that is the one we wage with ourselves. The Chanukah story is all about triumph against the enemy by accessing those qualities which we have to draw from the depths of our being. When this occurs and we know and understand our worth in the world, then miracles can begin to happen. When we have come out of our own battlefields scarred by the experiences we have had and choose to use the light we contain within, we truly become shining stars in the world. We can use the Macabees, as our role models who have taught us how each one of us has the potential to be a hero in the world. We can see JR Martinez living this message today. He teaches us that despite obstacles and adversity that challenge our lives, we have the capacity to radiate light out into the world as he has done.

As you watch the candles flicker, know that the flames you see are a reflection of the light that shines within you and that is where true beauty lies!

I received the following story in an email from Dr Menachem Seuss HaKohen:

Two men, both seriously ill, occupied the same hospital room.

One man was allowed to sit up in his bed for an hour each afternoon to help drain the fluid from his lungs.

His bed was next to the room’s only window.

The other man had to spend all his time flat on his back.

The men talked for hours on end.

They spoke of their wives and families, their homes, their jobs, their involvement in the military service, where they had been on vacation..

Every afternoon, when the man in the bed by the window could sit up, he would pass the time by describing to his roommate all the things he could see outside the window.

The man in the other bed began to live for those one hour periods where his world would be broadened and enlivened by all the activity and color of the world outside.

The window overlooked a park with a lovely lake.

Ducks and swans played on the water while children sailed their model boats. Young lovers walked arm in arm amidst flowers of every color and a fine view of the city skyline could be seen in the distance.

As the man by the window described all this in exquisite details, the man on the other side of the room would close his eyes and imagine this picturesque scene.

One warm afternoon, the man by the window described a parade passing by.

Although the other man could not hear the band – he could see it in his mind’s eye as the gentleman by the window portrayed it with descriptive words.

Days, weeks and months passed.

One morning, the day nurse arrived to bring water for their baths only to find the lifeless body of the man by the window, who had died peacefully in his sleep.

She was saddened and called the hospital attendants to take the body away.

As soon as it seemed appropriate, the other man asked if he could be moved next to the window. The nurse was happy to make the switch, and after making sure he was comfortable, she left him alone.

Slowly, painfully, he propped himself up on one elbow to take his first look at the real world outside.

He strained to slowly turn to look out the window besides the bed.

It faced a blank wall.

The man asked the nurse what could have compelled his deceased roommate who had described such wonderful things outside this window.

The nurse responded that the man was blind and could not even see the wall.

She said, ‘Perhaps he just wanted to encourage you.’

Author Info:

Learn & discover the Divine prophecies with Rabbi Simcha Weinberg from the holy Torah, Jewish Law, Mysticism, Kabbalah and Jewish Prophecies. The Foundation Stone™ is the ultimate resource for Jews, Judaism, Jewish Education, Jewish Spirituality & the holy Torah.

Sometimes humor can take a serious situation and turn it around.

A few years ago I was working with a senior Human Resources executive and he told me the following story.

He was the HR specialist for a large hospital and was in charge of negotiating with the union. However, in this particular negotiation, bitterness was evident on the side of the union, including racist and anti-Semitic remarks. The executive went to the president of the hospital and told him to bring in an outside arbitrator to settle the issue. The president asked him to go back one more time and see if he could work out a deal.

When the union representatives came into the meeting room, the management people were on one side of the table. So the union people sat on their side, but there was one person who did not have a seat because there were not enough chairs. The HR guy noticed there was an empty seat on the management side. So he offered to have the woman sit in the chair. As she went around the table the union people said to her, “Don’t let them poison your mind.”

When she sat down the executive said to his people, “Okay everyone .Sing. Help me Rhonda, help, help me Rhonda (a big hit song at the time). Everyone laughed and the tension was broken. The meeting ended with a successful completed negotiation.

Why did this work? And is this humor? After all, it was a song. So it is important to define humor. Humor, rather than being a series of jokes, has a broader definition. Humor is anything that puts a spirit of fun into the proceedings. And it does not have to produce a huge laugh. The most important attribute of humor in these situations is how it makes the participants feel after the laugh has subsided. A warmer, closer feeling.

Another point about humor is that it contains an element of surprise. If you hear a joke the second time you probably won’t laugh because you already know the punch line. So any surprise, for example, like a song, will bring a smile to someone’s face.

In this case, people who were not very friendly found a common way to relieve the tension. The song was also a subtle tribute to Rhonda, implying she had the power to help. It was a subtle complement to the union side.

The fact that this particular act of humor helped in a tense situation speaks to the awesome power of humor.

In the mid-1980s, the United States arrested an accused Soviet spy. In retaliation, the Soviet Union arrested a reporter for the Wall Street journal. There was a scheduled summit meeting between U.S. Secretary of State George Shultz and Soviet Foreign Minister Eduard Shevardnadze in Moscow to discuss nuclear arms limitations. The U.S. Senate voted a sense of the Senate resolution that Shultz should not go to Moscow as long as the journalist was being held. The president and George Schultz felt that arms limitations talks were important enough for him to go.

When Schultz walked into the negotiating room in Moscow, the atmosphere was tense. He pulled out a tape recorder and played a song, “Georgia on my mind” sung in Russian. Eduard Shevardnadze was from the Republic of Georgia. At the first break he went to Schultz and said, “Thank you George, that showed respect.” Even in tense international negotiations, humor saved the day because it was an acknowledgment of Shevardnadze’s home.

In the early 1970s I was a media buyer at a large advertising agency. This meant that I negotiated with salespeople from TV and radio on whether and where to place my client’s advertisements. This was the time when women were first coming into the workplace in corporate America and the first women who were salespeople for these organizations had to be very good.

A large television network hired a very smart woman to be their first saleswoman. She was very competent, but because she wanted to be taken seriously, she had no sense of humor. She also wore her hair in a bun, so that no hint of femininity would distract from her seriousness. I never felt comfortable bantering with her, and her face usually showed no expression. Most salespeople want to make the client feel comfortable. She made me uncomfortable.

One day she was in my office and she said something that prompted me to respond with a funny quip. She laughed heartily and her stiff face melted into a warm glow. From that time on, we got along famously. A quip that make someone laugh out loud is like sand blasting a rock.

Use humor with forethought. It has enormous power to defuse a tense situation.

My name is Aron Adler.

 

I am 25 years old, was born in Brooklyn NY, and raised in Efrat Israel.

Though very busy, I don’t view my life as unusual. Most of the time, I am

just another Israeli citizen. During the day I work as a paramedic in Magen

David Adom, Israel’s national EMS service. At night, I’m in my first year

of law school. I got married this October and am starting a new chapter of

life together with my wonderful wife Shulamit.

 

 

15-20 days out of every year, I’m called up to the Israeli army to do my

reserve duty. I serve as a paramedic in an IDF paratrooper unit. My squad

is made up of others like me; people living normal lives who step up to

serve whenever responsibility calls. The oldest in my squad is 58, a father

of four girls and grandfather of two; there are two bankers, one engineer,

a holistic healer, and my 24 year old commander who is still trying to

figure out what to do with his life. Most of the year we are just normal

people living our lives, but for 15-20 days each year we are soldiers on

the front lines preparing for a war that we hope we never have to fight.

 

This year, our reserve unit was stationed on the border between Israel,

Egypt and the Gaza Strip in an area called “Kerem Shalom.” Above and beyond

the “typical” things for which we train – war, terrorism, border

infiltration, etc., – this year we were confronted by a new challenge.

Several years ago, a trend started of African refugees crossing the

Egyptian border from Sinai into Israel to seek asylum from the atrocities

in Darfur.

 

What started out as a small number of men, women and children fleeing from

the machetes of the Janjaweed and violent fundamentalists to seek a better

life elsewhere, turned into an organized industry of human trafficking. In

return for huge sums of money, sometimes entire life savings paid to

Bedouin “guides,” these refugees are promised to be transported from Sudan,

Eritrea, and other African countries through Egypt and the Sinai desert,

into the safe haven of Israel.

 

We increasingly hear horror stories of the atrocities these refugees suffer

on their way to freedom. They are subject to, and victims of extortion,

rape, murder, and even organ theft, their bodies left to rot in the desert.

Then, if lucky, after surviving this gruesome experience whose prize is

freedom, when only a barbed wire fence separates them from Israel and their

goal, they must go through the final death run and try to evade the bullets

of the Egyptian soldiers stationed along the border. Egypt’s soldiers are

ordered to shoot to kill anyone trying to cross the border OUT of Egypt and

into Israel. It’s an almost nightly event.

For those who finally get across the border, the first people they

encounter are Israeli soldiers, people like me and those in my unit, who

are tasked with a primary mission of defending the lives of the Israeli

people. On one side of the border soldiers shoot to kill. On the other

side, they know they will be treated with more respect than in any of the

countries they crossed to get to this point.

 

The region where it all happens is highly sensitive and risky from a

security point of view, an area stricken with terror at every turn. It’s

just a few miles south of the place where Gilad Shalit was kidnapped. And

yet the Israeli soldiers who are confronted with these refugees do it not

with rifles aimed at them, but with a helping hand and an open heart. The

refugees are taken to a nearby IDF base, given clean clothes, a hot drink,

food and medical attention. They are finally safe.

 

Even though I live Israel and am aware through media reports of the events

that take place on the Egyptian border, I never understood the intensity

and complexity of the scenario until I experienced it myself.

 

In the course of the past few nights, I have witnessed much. At 9:00 PM

last night, the first reports came in of gunfire heard from the Egyptian

border. Minutes later, IDF scouts spotted small groups of people trying to

get across the fence. In the period of about one hour, we picked up 13 men

- cold, barefoot, dehydrated – some wearing nothing except underpants.

Their bodies were covered with lacerations and other wounds. We gathered

them in a room, gave them blankets, tea and treated their wounds. I don’t

speak a word of their language, but the look on their faces said it all and

reminded me once again why I am so proud to be a Jew and an Israeli. Sadly,

it was later determined that the gunshots we heard were deadly, killing

three others fleeing for their lives.

 

During the 350 days a year when I am not on active duty, when I am just

another man trying to get by, the people tasked with doing this amazing

job, this amazing deed, the people witnessing these events, are mostly

young Israeli soldiers just out of high school, serving their compulsory

time in the IDF, some only 18 years old.

 

The refugees flooding into Israel are a heavy burden on our small country.

More than 100,000 refugees have fled this way, and hundreds more cross the

border every month. The social, economic, and humanitarian issues created

by this influx of refugees are immense. There are serious security

consequences for Israel as well. This influx of African refugees poses a

crisis for Israel. Israel has yet to come up with the solutions required to

deal with this crisis effectively, balancing its’ sensitive social,

economic, and security issues, at the same time striving to care for the

refugees.

 

I don’t have the answers to these complex problems which desperately need

to be resolved. I’m not writing these words with the intention of taking a

political position or a tactical stand on the issue.

 

I am writing to tell you and the entire world what’s really happening down

here on the Egyptian/Israeli border. And to tell you that despite all the

serious problems created by this national crisis, these refugees have no

reason to fear us. Because they know, as the entire world needs to know,

that Israel has not shut its eyes to their suffering and pain. Israel has

not looked the other way. The State of Israel has put politics aside to

take the ethical and humane path as it has so often done before, in every

instance of human suffering and natural disasters around the globe. We Jews

know only too well about suffering and pain. The Jewish people have been

there. We have been the refugees and the persecuted so many times, over

thousands of years, all over the world.

 

Today, when African refugees flood our borders in search of freedom and

better lives, and some for fear of their lives, it is particularly

noteworthy how Israel deals with them, despite the enormous strain it puts

on our country on so many levels. Our young and thriving Jewish people and

country, built from the ashes of the Holocaust, do not turn their backs on

humanity. Though I already knew that, this week I once again experienced it

firsthand. I am overwhelmed with emotion and immensely proud to be a member

of this nation.

With love of Israel,

Aron Adler writing from the Israel/Gaza/Egyptian border.

What do a bracha (blessing) and Thanksgiving have in common?

A bracha’s essential element is to recognize a good that was done for us and to express appreciation for that good. It is gratitude, and gratitude is the essential ingredient for a human being to be happy. If you expect nothing and get something, you’re happy. A bracha is an opportunity to focus on the things we receive but don’t really pay attention to.

I learned this lesson from Rav Simcha Weinberg. We were sitting down to have lunch, and he asked me if I wanted to make an olam hazeh (this world) blessing or an olam haba (heavenly)

blessing. I said, “The heavenly blessing. What is that?” He explained that a “this world” blessing is muttered in haste. The heavenly blessing slows us down and focuses us. So he told me to describe all the people involved in producing the pasta I was about to eat.

I started enumerating: a person planted a seed, someone cultivated the seed, then the wheat was harvested, someone had to put it in a truck and take it to the silo. Then it had to be shipped across country in a truck so there was a truck driver. It got to New York and had to be delivered by another truck driver to the particular cafeteria where we were eating. Then someone heated the pasta and poured the sauce.

The Rabbi said to me, “Look at the gratitude you owe to all of the people involved in bringing you this food.” A lot of people worked to deliver the pasta, so gratitude is due.

Then he told me to close my eyes and just breathe and appreciate the aroma coming from the pasta and sauce. With my eyes closed, my focus was totally on the sensation of my sense of smell. I had really never noticed an aroma as I had when I closed my eyes. Then he finally told me to make the blessing, slowly, and think about everything I was saying . He was correct. The blessing was a different blessing filled with gratitude. I appreciated my meal both mentally and through more of my senses. I took note, was grateful and enjoyed.

Thanksgiving is a holiday that teaches us to focus on the everyday bounty we may take for granted. Thanksgiving is a meaningful holiday for people of the United States of America. We all need to appreciate what we have, and as the Rabbis teach us, “Who is rich? People who take joy in what they have.” Please note that it does not say that people should be content to stay with what they have. Striving to gain more of what you want is okay. But happiness can be achieved today, as well as in the future.

Thanksgiving is a time when we need to reflect on how safe and good the United States has been to Jews and other persecuted peoples. It is a country that pioneered religious freedom. Have you ever read the letter George Washington sent to the Touro Synagogue in Newport, Rhode Island?

The key phrases are: All possess alike liberty of conscience and immunities of citizenship. It is now no more that toleration is spoken of, as if it was by the indulgence of one class of people, that another enjoyed the exercise of their inherent natural rights. For happily the Government of the United States, which gives to bigotry no sanction, to persecution no assistance, requires only that they who live under its protection should demean themselves as good citizens, in giving it on all occasions their effectual support.

May the children of the stock of Abraham, who dwell in this land, continue to merit and enjoy the goodwill of the other inhabitants; while every one shall sit in safety under his own vine and fig tree, and there shall be none to make him afraid.

It is a little letter with large implications.

The question I have is, can we make the sehechiyanu blessing? It is a blessing that gives thanks that we have survived and reached this season. It would seem to be appropriate. After all, the prayer is there to have us focus on all the ramifications of reaching this season. If you don’t think that saying the first part of the blessing, which includes G-d’s name, is warranted, then just start from the word sehechiyanu, or say the last part in English: Bless He who has kept us alive, sustained us, and brought us to this season. Take note, be grateful and enjoy.

With the freedom to be Jewish perhaps a good way to celebrate Thanksgiving is to do something you haven’t done in terms of being Jewish. Maybe you will pick up a Jewish book on ethics or philosophy and read it. Maybe you will give a little more charity to a Jewish organization. There are numerous books, websites and posts on Youtube. This website has many short ideas that are quick to read and will expand your mind. Even if you are a devotee, try one of the resources you never look at.

Another way to celebrate Thanksgiving, an American holiday, is to donate money to a food bank so that more Americans will celebrate Thanksgiving.

Have a delicious dinner… and savor it!

I’m feeling vulnerable! Just when we thought the worst was over and moved everything back outside, the wind began to really blow! A huge tree just in front of our home blew down pulling the electrical cables with it, and put the entire neighborhood into the dark.

The tree just missed our car. It fell on top of our neighbor’s car without actually touching the car! Its branches are holding it up. Just its leaves are brushing against the vehicle. The police didn’t want us to walk anywhere in the area because of the electrical cables.

It was not the hurricane that made me feel vulnerable. It wasn’t the wind. It wasn’t the tree or the electrical cables. I realized that my grandfather zt”l grew up using candles at night in a much smaller home, and with much less safety. He was not fazed by the dark; he just kept on learning. He wasn’t fazed by not having hot coffee; he just kept on learning. He wasn’t fazed by the wind; he just kept on learning, and learning and learning. That’s why I am feeling so vulnerable!

My life has become so dependent on externals that my learning suffers when I lose just a few of them! My Torah study is vulnerable to external circumstances in a way that my grandfather’s learning was not.

I’ve been trying to figure out why God wanted me to experience someone accusing me of lacking proper respect for Torah (Real Kavod haTorah). The explanation is obvious; I am lacking in respect for my own learning. It is too fragile and dependent on circumstances. The best way to honor my mother, may she live and be well, is to honor the Torah she raised me to learn, independent of any and all externals.

Author Info:
Learn & discover the Divine prophecies with Rabbi Simcha Weinberg from the holy Torah, Jewish Law, Mysticism, Kabbalah and Jewish Prophecies. The Foundation Stone is the ultimate resource for Jews, Judaism, Jewish Education, Jewish Spirituality & the holy Torah.