In “Balance,” and “David, Yoav & Abner I,” we began to explain David’s opening charge to Solomon from his deathbed, urging him to balance his dual roles as person and king (Be a Man). We’ve seen how David dealt with Abner, but we still must explain his reaction to, and his instructions regarding, Joab.

We continue with the story of Abner, David, and Joab:

“Abner conferred with the elders of Israel and said, ‘For some time you have wanted to make David your king. Now do it! For God promised David, ‘By my servant David I will rescue my people Israel from the hand of the Philistines and from the hand of all their enemies.’

Abner also spoke to the Benjamites in person.”

Abner had already sent a message to David promising to bring all of Israel over to his side, and yet, it is only now that, “Abner conferred with the elders of Israel!”

“For some time you have wanted to make David your King. Now do it! For God promised David.” Clearly, Abner knew that the elders of Israel wanted to make David the king. There was only one thing stopping them all along; Abner!

When Abner approaches them, he is admitting that he had put his drive for power over the desires of the elders of Israel, and over God’s promise! What happened to allow this man so driven for power to make such a humiliating admission?

David’s balanced response to Abner. If the new King himself struggles with remaining a “normal” man even while assuming the reins of power, and is willing to convey that message to the man who can bring all of Israel to his side, then he is a man who understands Abner’s own internal struggle. Abner is now willing to confront the people he has been stopping from making David their king and admit his mistake.

Whereas Abner “conferred with the elders of Israel,” he, “spoke to the Benjamites in person.” Benjamin was the tribe of Saul and the current King, Ish-Bosheth. They would be forfeiting the power of being the tribe of the King. It is only Abner, who understands the quest for power, the nature of power, and, who is willing to his drive for power sublimate in order to fulfill God’s oath, and, to publicly make his humiliating admission, who can speak to the tribe of Benjamin. It is Abner’s “person,” that convinces Benjamin.

Perhaps Abner did not directly speak of David’s sense of balance, but the message transmitted in his conferring with the elders and ‘personally’ speaking to Benjamin, conveyed David’s message:

David’s reign would be one of great balance, something that had been painfully lacking when Saul was king. Abner is not only supporting David, the king, he is supporting David’s message.

This is the message of Abner that would be so damaged when he is assassinated by David’s general, Joab. Joab was the disturber of balance, again, an essential part of David’s opening message to Solomon.

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“Talents are better nurtured in solitude, but character is best formed in the stormy billows of the world (Johann Wolfgang von Goethe).”

We have been accompanying Jacob as he traces backwards the steps of his life in this life-defining portion, “Jacob Lived,” as his mission to reverse the steps taken by those who distanced themselves from the Garden in Eden, and, as the man who, “Did Not Die,” who addresses death and its consequences of “Envy,” & “The Green Master,” distance from God, leaking energy, and breaking links to the eternal (For King David’s similar concern, see, “Haftarah-Vayechi-Reading the Text I”). (“A Different Sort of Fear of Life,” “Not Waiting For the Monument,” “The Fragrance of Permanence,” “Stopping the Leaks,” “Strength from Brokenness, with a slight detour that, hopefully, will eventually become clear, in “Power of Softness”)

Jacob may very well have been a master teacher guiding Rachel and Leah in their relationship with God, but he still had much to do. Jacob decides to not directly address certain outstanding issues between Rachel and Leah but to allow them, now that they have developed their relationship with God in both, His Attribute of Compassion and His Attribute of Strength–judgment, to address their issues together.

“During wheat harvest, Reuben went out into the fields and found some mandrake plants, which he brought to his mother Leah. Rachel said to Leah, ‘Please give me some of your son’s mandrakes.’

But she said to her, ‘Wasn’t it enough that you took away my husband? Will you take my son’s mandrakes too?’

“Wasn’t it enough that you took away my husband? Will you take my son’s mandrakes too?” Leah is still angry with Rachel! Not only that, she accuses Rachel of taking Jacob from her! After all, Leah was Jacob’s first wife. Did Leah forget that she successfully folded Jacob only when her sister unselfishly confided certain predetermined secret signals to her sister so that we are would not be put to shame (Rashi, Genesis 29:25)? How could she possibly accuse her selfless sister of taking Jacob from her?

Was Rachel so insensitive to her sister that she did not suspect how Leah would feel when Rachel asked her for the mandrakes? The sister who was willing to give up her wedding bed to her sister was not an insensitive person.

‘Very well,’ Rachel said, ‘he can sleep with you tonight in return for your son’s mandrakes.’

When we pay careful attention to Rachel’s request, “Please give me some of your son’s mandrakes,” we see that Rachel is asking her sister to share. This is not Rachel saying, “I shared my bed with you, so you share your flowers with me!” This was the Rachel who had successfully incorporated Jacob’s lesson of relating to God both in His Attribute of Compassion and His Attribute of Strength–judgment: Rachel was saying to Leah, “We, who began with two very different relationships with God, and successfully learned to combine them, can now share everything in and eternal way.”

Leah was not yet ready to hear Rachel’s message. Leah had such a powerful sense of obligation to Rachel that she could not imagine denying her sister’s request. Rachel’s request was synonymous with a demand! In Leah’s mind, she was being forced to give up something her son had given her.

Rachel understands her sister. “Very well,” Rachel said, “he can sleep with you tonight in return for your sons mandrakes.” Rachel does not say, “Jacob can sleep with you,” she says, “he!” Rachel understands that even though they had been discussing flowers, Leah was speaking only of her relationship with Jacob. Rachel, in the effect, was telling her sister, “I am willing to again share my bed with you!” What happened the night of your wedding to Jake up was not an emergency reaction; it was a statement to you, a statement I am reaffirming now, that I understand that we do not exist independent of each other and, just as we share this new level of a relationship with God, we share in that eternal connection with Jacob.

Did Leah understand Rachel’s message? We’ll see…

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We concluded Part One wondering how David’s opening message of balance to Solomon bears on all the instructions that follow. We pay close attention to the way the prophet formats the text, where he places an open space, indicating a new topic, or a closed space, indicating a related topic. The following verses are included in the same paragraph as David’s opening message, clearly indicating that they are part of the same message!

“Now you yourself know what Joab son of Zeruiah did to me—what he did to the two commanders of Israel’s armies, Abner son of Ner and Amasa son of Jether. He killed them, shedding their blood in peacetime as if in battle, and with that blood he stained the belt around his waist and the sandals on his feet. Deal with him according to your wisdom, but do not let his gray head go down to the grave in peace (I Kings 2:5-6).

“What he did to me!” Was Joab’s sin directed at David and not at the “commanders of Israel’s armies?” Does David need to mention the method Joab used to murder Abner and Amasa, “with that blood he sustained the belt around his waist and the sandals on his feet.” Why had David not dealt with Joab?

“During the war between the house of Saul and the house of David, Abner had been strengthening his own position in the house of Saul. Now Saul had had a concubine named Rizpah daughter of Aiah. And Ish-Bosheth said to Abner, ‘Why did you sleep with my father’s concubine?’

Abner was very angry because of what Ish-Bosheth said. So he answered, ‘Am I a dog’s head—on Judah’s side? This very day I am loyal to the house of your father Saul and to his family and friends. I haven’t handed you over to David. Yet now you accuse me of an offense involving this woman! May God deal with Abner, be it ever so severely, if I do not do for David what God promised him on oath and transfer the kingdom from the house of Saul and establish David’s throne over Israel and Judah from Dan to Beersheba.’ Ish-Bosheth did not dare to say another word to Abner, because he was afraid of him (II Samuel 3:6-11).”

We must begin with the powerful contrast between Joab and Abner: Both are men in positions of great power and attempting to strengthen their positions. Abner clearly knew of God’s oath to David, as he says, “If I do not do for David what God promised him on both and transfer the kingdom from the house of Saul and establish David’s throne over Israel and Judah.” Abner knew of the oath, and yet, still focused on supporting Saul’s son Ish-Bosheth because he was focused on, “strengthening his own position in the house of Saul.”

This man, so focused on his power despite God’s oath, when he understands what he is doing, changes from focusing on his power to strengthening David. Abner’s bottom line was to overcome his own drives and support David, the recipient of God’s promise.

We have David’s enemy coming to his senses. We have one of David’s most important supporters placing his concerns above his king’s.

“Then Abner sent messengers on his behalf to say to David, ‘Whose land is it? Make an agreement with me, and I will help you bring all Israel over to you.’

‘Good,’ said David. ‘I will make an agreement with you. But I demand one thing of you: Do not come into my presence unless you bring Michal daughter of Saul when you come to see me.’ Then David sent messengers to Ish-Bosheth son of Saul, demanding, ‘Give me my wife Michal, whom I betrothed to myself for the price of a hundred Philistine foreskins.’

“So Ish-Bosheth gave orders and had her taken away from her husband Paltiel son of Laish. Her husband, however, went with her, weeping behind her all the way to Bahurim. Then Abner said to him, ‘Go back home!’ So he went back (12-16).”

David’s response to Abner is to demand his wife. Before Abner agrees to David’s demand, “David sent messengers to Ish-Bosheth demanding,” that he return David’s wife, Michal, to, “whom I betrothed myself for the price of a hundred Philistine foreskins.” David wants his wife. David is functioning as a human being, not a king, at least, when he raises the issue with Abner. He then approaches Ish-Bosheth, King to King, demanding the wife to whom he betrothed himself by fighting for Ish-Bosheth’s father, Saul, the first King of Israel. David is definitely balancing his dual roles as king and a man.

Abner, whose support is necessary to make David king over all of Israel, must deal with a David functioning as a man: “Her husband, however, went with her, weeping behind her all the way to Bahurim. Then Abner said to him, ‘Go back home!’ So he went back.” Did David do not think that he would benefit from dealing with Abner from his position of power, rather than that of a man pining for his wife?

David, the “balanced” King, clearly understands that although Abner is offering support to fulfill God’s promise to David, Abner is still the same man who, just a short while ago, was focused on strengthening his position in the house of Saul. The balanced King knows how to deal with Abner the loyal follower of God, and Abner the man focused on his own power. This, is the magnificence of a king who is able to maintain his own sense of balance; he is able to use that balance in his dealings with other people. This part of the Joab story must be in the same paragraph as David’s opening charge to Solomon: It is a lesson in the balanced wisdom in using power.

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When the time drew near for David to die, he gave a charge to Solomon his son. “I am about to go the way of all the earth,” he said. “So be strong, become a man, and observe what God your Lord requires: Walk in His ways, and guard preciously His decrees and commands, His laws and regulations, as written in the Law of Moshe. Do this so that you may prosper in all you do and wherever you go, and that God may keep His promise to me: ‘If your descendants watch how they live, and if they walk faithfully before me with all their heart and soul, you will never fail to have a successor on the throne of Israel.’ (I Kings 2:1-4)”

In, “Be a Man,” and “The Power of Softness,” we spoke of fathers addressing children in positions of power about remaining connected to “normal” life. When we carefully examine David’s final words to Solomon, we find that it is more than urging the young king to retain his “normalcy.” David is actually addressing balance:

“I am about to go the way of all the earth,” I am just as are all the people of the earth. David speaks of himself as just another man even as he says that God promised him, “you will never fail to have a successor on the throne of Israel.” David is speaking to Solomon as a link in an eternal chain. (“Strength from Brokenness”) David’s greatness, the message he is conveying to Solomon in these words, is his ability to balance his power as King, the first link in an eternal chain with his basic humanity.

I suspect that it is only with this sense of balance that a king will be able to remember to “Walk in His ways, and guard preciously His decrees and commands.” David is not saying, “Do this,” referring to obedience, but, “Do this,” to live with this sense of balance.

This message of balance becomes even more essential as David continues his final instructions to Solomon.

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“Softness triumphs over hardness, gentleness over strength .

The flexible is superior over at the immovable.

This is the principle of controlling things by going along with them,

of mastery through adaptation (Lao-Tzu).”

“Jacob lived in Egypt seventeen years, and the years of his life were a hundred and forty-seven. When the time drew near for Israel to die, he called for his son Joseph and said to him, ‘If I have found favor in your eyes, put your hand under my thigh and promise that you will show me kindness and faithfulness. Do not bury me in Egypt, but when I rest with my fathers, carry me out of Egypt and bury me where they are buried.’ ‘I will do as you say,’ he said. ‘Swear to me,’ he said. Then Joseph swore to him, and Israel bowed toward the head of the bed (47:28-31).”

This is the first, and the only time that Jacob has summoned Joseph since their powerful meeting seventeen years earlier. For some reason Jacob waits for the end of his life to speak with Joseph about this important issue. Jacob was not someone who paid attention to all the large advertisements urging people to “Plan Ahead!”

What did Joseph expect his father to address when he received the summons? Did he think that Jacob would finally speak to him about the brothers? Would Jacob urge Joseph to forgive them? Would Jacob ask for all the details of how Joseph ended up in Egypt? Did Joseph expect Jacob to urge him to continue to support and protect them? Or, did Joseph know that Jacob would speak with him about funeral arrangements?

We aren’t privy to the entire conversation between father and son. We don’t know how they greeted each other or what they discussed. We don’t know if Joseph asked his father why he had been summoned. The text shares with us only what is absolutely necessary for us to know, and does so in a way that conveys through the subtext the underlying message of this epochal meeting.

Jacob is speaking as both a father (“Be a Man!” “Receiving the Transmission,” and, “Haftarah-Vayechi-Reading the Text) and as a subject supplicating before the mandarin, “he called for his son Joseph,” both, ‘his son,’ and, ‘Joseph,’ the viceroy:

“If I have found favor in your eyes,” “Israel bowed toward the head of the bed,” both indicate Jacob addressing Joseph as the Egyptian viceroy. A summons, “Put your hand under my thigh and promise that you will show me kindness and faithfulness,” is a father speaking to his son, a person in power requesting an oath from a lesser person, just as Abraham made the same request of his servant Eliezer.

Jacob makes it clear that he expects Joseph the son to rise above his position as Joseph the Viceroy: “Do not bury me in Egypt,” something you do not say to the viceroy of the country that has welcomed you with open arms, gifted you with prime property, and supported you during a famine!

Once Joseph demonstrates his loyalty as son is greater than his position in Egypt, Jacob can be certain that the anamnesis of his death bed blessings will not trigger resentment and perhaps even vengeful feelings toward his brothers. Jacob demands, and Joseph accepts, that Joseph will primarily function as a member of the family and not as the powerful Egyptian viceroy.

The end of the previous portion, Vayigash, demonstrated Joseph as someone perfectly comfortable with taking full advantage of his awesome power. “Joseph acquired all the land of Egypt for Pharaoh (47:20).” “We will become serfs to Pharaoh (47:19).” “I have acquired you this day with your land for Pharaoh (Verse 23).” “So Joseph imposed as a statute till this day regarding the land of Egypt: It was Pharaoh’s for the fifth (Verse 26).” Joseph knew how, and was willing, to use his power.

Jacob understood Joseph’s intentions to protect the Children of Israel in the future so that they would not feel as outsiders (Rashi, 47:21), but he also understood that eventually Joseph would die, and the Egyptian historians would begin to examine his decisions and would write countless papers describing his arbitrary use of power to protect the throne. People would soon forget that it was Joseph who saved the nation (Exodus 1:8), and would deal with the long-term consequences of his usurpation of Egyptian land and independence.

Jacob used this meeting, in which he guided Joseph into insisting that his role as a brother, a member of a family, was far more important to him than his role as Viceroy. Jacob brought out the humanity of Joseph; he guided him into connecting to himself as a person, a quality he needed in his leadership skills. Jacob was softening Joseph.

I don’t know what Joseph was thinking upon receiving his father’s summons; but I do know that simply receiving a summons reminded him that underneath all his royal robes, he was still a son.

We often read stories of people who, with the best of intentions, assert their power over those weaker than they. Perhaps they should pay attention to Jacob’s powerful message to Joseph: If you want to use your power; always first remember that you, too, are a son to your father. Remember, when you spit at a little girl, that she is a daughter, just as you have a daughter; she is a child just as you were once a child. If you must use your power; use it with softness.

“Its (The Torah’s) ways are ways of pleasantness and all its paths are peace (Proverbs 3:17).” We may not use a Willow on Succot that has sharp edges because “its ways are ways of pleasantness,” and a sharp edge may make a small part of the Four Species unpleasant! We certainly may not use power and force to impose Torah in the most unpleasant of ways.

If someone gives you power use it  with caution. Silence is power

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“I had not always believed that strength could come from brokenness, or that the thread of a divine purpose could be seen in tragedy. But I do now (Max Cleland).” (“Seven Levels of Teshuva: Avraham and Healing”)

The Torah uses a single verse to teach us that Jacob had a remarkable approach to life. (“A Different Sort of Fear of Life,” “Not Waiting For the Monument,” “The Fragrance of Permanence,” and, “Stopping the Leaks.”) We have seen that, “Vayechi is the story of a man who lived every moment of his life, even in death and after!” We determined that, “Jacob used these final scenes to guide his children to sense the fragrance of permanence, not of death and its ensuing impermanence.” We demonstrated that Jacob rarely “leaked” energy, a “death” experience, but managed to contain and expand the energy with which God filled him. The only time he “leaked” energy was when he lost the sense of the eternal.

Let’s continue to study Jacob’s life before Egypt to better understand where and how Jacob mastered eternal life. We left off after Jacob’s seven year wait for Rachel was as just a few days.

Jacob soon confronts someone thinking of death:

“When Rachel saw that she was not bearing Jacob any children, she became jealous of her sister. So she said to Jacob, ‘Give me children, or I’ll die!’

Jacob became angry with her and said, “Am I in the place of the Lord, Who has kept you from having children?” (30:1-2)

Jacob, who wept upon meeting Rachel because they wouldn’t be buried together, whose mother also wished for death when thinking of children, has no patience for his beloved’s intense feelings of sadness over being childless!

Professor Nechama Leibovitz a”h, in her usual masterful way, applies a teaching of the Akeidat Yitzchak to this scene: Rav Yitzchak Arama points out that there are two names for the Primal Woman: “Isha,” as explained by Rashi, derived from ‘Eish,’ fire, representing the woman as an independent being; and, ‘Chava,’ the ‘mother of life, representing the woman as mother and caregiver. Professot Leibovitz explains that when Rachel wanted to die if she remained childless, she was choosing only one of her roles, that of Chava, the mother, and rejecting her life as an Isha. Jacob’s response was to point out that she cannot choose only one of the roles; she had to live as both.

I use this to explain the custom of the husband preparing the wife’s Shabbat candles; He is nurturing her Isha.

As beautiful as that explanation may be, I do not define Isha or Chava the same way. Chava means to articulate, The Articulator, and Isha has an added dimension of a person with greatness who willing forfeits her status just to be with her husband, just as Eve left the Garden to be with Adam, in fulfillment of, “Your desire will be for your husband, and he will rule over you (3:16). (See “Family Secrets from the Articulator,” “Vashti v Esther,” “Conversations with Myself,” and, “Morning Blessings for the Nine Days-Part Three: Who has not made me a woman.”)

A careful reading of the text will explain Jacob’s reaction to Rachel’s cry, his fear of her connecting to the negative aspect of Isha, and Cain’s sin:

“When Rachel saw that she was not bearing Jacob any children, she became jealous of her sister. So she said to Jacob, ‘Give me children, or I’ll die!’” Rachel was jealous, breaking her eternal link to Jacob, just as Eve’s jealousy led her to trip Adam (Rashi; 3:6), and Cain to break his link to eternal life, humanity, and to murder Abel. (“Mistakes-Latznu,” “Ever Since Adam & Cain One,” “Trying Again,” “Commentary to the Vidui-Part Five; Avinu.”)

Jacob understood that again someone was breaking their link to the eternal and tasting death, so he said, “Am I in the place of the Lord, Who has kept you from having children?” Jacob was assuming the role of teacher, and repairing the break between “God,” the Attribute of Compassion, and “The Lord,” the Attribute of Power-Judgement:

“When God saw that Leah was not loved, he enabled her to conceive, but Rachel remained childless. Leah became pregnant and gave birth to a son. She named him Reuben, for she said, ‘It is because God has seen my misery. Surely my husband will love me now.’

She conceived again, and when she gave birth to a son she said, ‘Because God heard that I am not loved, he gave me this one too.’ So she named him Simeon.

Again she conceived, and when she gave birth to a son she said, “Now at last my husband will become attached to me, because I have borne him three sons.’ So he was named Levi.

She conceived again, and when she gave birth to a son she said, ‘This time I will praise God.’ So she named him Judah. Then she stopped having children (29:31-35).” Leah consistently speaks of God, the Attribute of Compassion.

Rachel speaks of the Lord, the Attribute of Power-Judgment: Then Rachel said, ‘The Lord has vindicated me; He has listened to my plea and given me a son.’ Because of this she named him Dan (30:6).”

Then, something changes:

The Lord listened to Leah, and she became pregnant and bore Jacob a fifth son. Then Leah said, ‘The Lord has rewarded me for giving my servant to my husband.’ So she named him Issachar.

Leah conceived again and bore Jacob a sixth son. Then Leah said, “The Lord has presented me with a precious gift. This time my husband will treat me with honor, because I have borne him six sons.” So she named him Zebulun.

Some time later she gave birth to a daughter and named her Dinah [derived from ‘Din,’ judgment].

Then The Lord remembered Rachel; He listened to her and enabled her to conceive. She became pregnant and gave birth to a son and said, ‘The Lord has taken away my disgrace.” She named him Joseph, and said, ‘May God add to me another son’ (30:17-24).” [For those of you bothered by my switching the more common translation of God and Lord; I am following the teachings of my father zt”l who insisted that it does not make sense to say, “The Lord is God,” because God is His Essence; the Shema is to accept God as our Lord, meaning that He cares enough to judge our actions.]
Rachel and Leah were each relating to one aspect of our relationship with the Ultimate Being, which is a break of “Hashem Elokeinu,” God is our Lord, in the Shema, and a break in the story of the relationship between the Spiritual and Physical creations, expressed in, “This is the account of the heavens and the earth when they were created, when God the Lord made the earth and the heavens (2:4).” (See “The Ladder Comes to Life.”)

Jacob taught Rachel and Leah that the only way we can maintain an unbroken link between the Spiritual and Physical creations, to link to the Eternal, is to relate to both God and the Lord.

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I recall a story about a man who was always tired and who prayed each day for more energy. His prayers were never answered, until one day, in a fit of despair, he cried, “Please, oh, Lord, fill me with energy! And God answered, “I’m always filling you, but you keep on leaking!”

I‘ve been thinking of that story as we have been studying Jacob’s life in Egypt and how he addresses many of the major themes with which he has struggled in “A Different Sort of Fear of Life,” “Not Waiting For the Monument,” and “The Fragrance of Permanence.” So far we have seen that, “Vayechi is the story of a man who lived every moment of his life, even in death and after!” And that, “Jacob used these final scenes to guide his children to sense the fragrance of permanence, not of death and its ensuing impermanence.” I believe that we will find that Jacob rarely “leaked” energy, a “death” experience, but managed to contain and expand the energy with which God filled him (“Spirituals 101,” and, “Mishlei-Insight and Application”):

“So Jacob served seven years to get Rachel, but they seemed like only a few days to him because of his love for her (29:20),” doesn’t sound like the approach of someone thinking of death imposing limitations on life; had Jacob, as had Rebecca, Isaac, and Esau, been thinking of death, he could not have experienced seven years of waiting as just a few days!

The only period that seemed to drag on endlessly for Jacob was when he was mourning Joseph’s death, “Then Jacob tore his clothes, put on sackcloth and mourned for his son many days. All his sons and daughters came to comfort him, but he refused to be comforted. ‘No,’ he said, ‘I will continue to mourn until I join my son in the grave.’ So his father wept for him (37:34-35).”

When Jacob was attuned to the eternal, seven years seemed like just a few days. He was inconsolable when he felt that he had “leaked out” the eternal; Joseph’s death meant that the family was no longer whole, and that he had lost his ultimate weapon against Esau (Rashi, 30:25).

Jacob sensed his eternal connection with Rachel the second he saw her, which is why he grabbed her and kissed her; he wept when he saw that they would not be buried together; that something was lacking in their eternal connection.

Jacob contained all the energy showered on him by God, except when he tasted the loss of the eternal; the taste of death, just as Adam’s loss of immortality affected everything he did; he lost his sense of living in the Garden of Eden, his ability to eat of the Tree of Life.

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“Ah, the knowledge of impermanence that haunts our days is their very fragrance (Rainer Maria Rilke).”

We’ve begun to trace Jacob’s steps backwards through those of Adam and others who distanced themselves from life in the Garden in Eden, in “A Different Sort of Fear of Life,” and, “Not Waiting For the Monument.” We posited that, “And Jacob lived,” “Vayechi,” is the story of a man who lived every moment of his life, even in death and after!”

Let’s study more of Jacob’s life to better understand how he defined life in the face of death:

“Then Jacob kissed Rachel and began to weep aloud (29:11),” he wept “because he saw that they would not be buried together (Rashi),” burial, Rachel, and death; all issues Jacob addresses in “And he Lived!” “As I was returning from Paddan, to my sorrow, Rachel died in the land of Canaan while we were still on the way, a little distance from Ephrat. So I buried her there beside the road to Ephrat, that is, Bethlehem (48:7).” Jacob os clearly addressing all these issues that have been associated with so many of the major events in his life. It’s tempting to say, “Ah! He finally had peace, and could really live these last seventeen years while in Egypt, his family whole again. Yet, we know nothing of these years other than what is described in these final scenes.

In fact, saying that he finally lived in peace is reminiscent of a terrible tragedy: “Jacob settled in the land where his father had sojourned, the land of Canaan (37:1),” after his life-long struggles, Jacob desired to settle down in tranquility, but the anguish of the Joseph affair sprang upon him; when the righteous look for tranquility, The Holy One, Blessed is He, says, “Are the righteous not satisfied with what is stored up for them in the World to Come that they expect to live in ease in this world too!” (Rashi) Some midrashim take it further and say, “The righteous have tranquility neither in this world or the next (which will be eternally expansive)!” No, “And Jacob lived,” cannot imply that he lived in tranquility. He still had much work to do. (“The Courage to be Carried”) This portion describes some of the most important and non-tranquil, work of Jacob’s life. That is exactly what is meant by, “And Jacob lived;” he maximized his years in Egypt (Shabbat Prayers-Vayigash-Psalm 90), he offered his progeny a taste of his Spiritual accomplishments (Jacob-Alive in Death).

Jacob used these final scenes to guide his children to sense the fragrance of permanence (A Permanent Guest), not of death and its ensuing impermanence. The same fragrance that caught Isaac’s attention, “When Isaac caught the smell of his clothes, he blessed him and said,

“Ah, the smell of my son

is like the smell of a field

that God has blessed (27:27),” Isaac caught the smell of the Garden of Eden in Jacob’s clothes; the clothes he “borrowed” from Esau!

Smell; the only one of the five senses not used in the sin of the Tree of Knowledge.

Can we discover where and how Jacob mastered eternal life? Let’s see…

Author Info:
Learn & discover the Divine prophecies with Rabbi Simcha Weinberg from the holy Torah, Jewish Law, Mysticism, Kabbalah and Jewish Prophecies. The Foundation Stone™ is the ultimate resource for Jews, Judaism, Jewish Education, Jewish Spirituality & the holy Torah.

“Man, born of woman, is short-lived and full of trouble. Like a flower that springs up and fades, swift as a shadow that does not abide, even so he wastes away like a rotten thing; like a garment that the moth has consumed (Job 14:28).”

“To Whoever is Reading Me”

You are invulnerable. Have they not granted you

the powers that preordain your destiny,

the certainty of dust? Is not your time

as irreversible as that same river

where Heraclitus, mirrored, saw the symbol

of fleeting life? A marble slab awaits you

which you will not read–on it, already written,

the date, the city, and the epitaph.

Other men too are only dreams of time,

not indestructible bronze or burnished gold;

the universe is, like you, a Proteus.

Dark, you will enter the darkness that awaits you,

doomed to the limits of your traveled time.

Know that in some sense you are already dead.

(Jorge Luis Borges)

“Jacob, our Patriarch, did not die (Ta’anit 5a).”

In “A Different Sort of Fear of Life,” we realized that many of the major events in Jacob’s life were shaped by the way people faced death, and we traced that back to the Garden in Eden. Is it not fascinating that this portion is named, “Vayechi,” “And he lived?”

We’ve had, “Vayeitzei,” “And he left;” Vayishlach,” “And he sent;” “Vayeishev,” “And he settled;” now we finally have Jacob living!

We had, “God, the Lord, sent him from the Garden in Eden (2:23),” [Banished!] Adam left the Garden, and settled outside the Garden [Just That Little Bit Removed].” No wonder the Sages teach that, “Jacob’s beauty was a reflection of Adam’s (Bava Metzia 84a),” Jacob retraced the life of Adam back to its beginning when, “Man became a living being (2:7).”

How does the man who, after living a life unsullied by the fear of death, reconnected to Adam’s becoming a living being, face his death?

“Do not bury me in Egypt, but when I rest with my fathers, carry me out of Egypt and bury me where they are buried (47:29-30),” which reflects a life lived conquering the way other people dealt with death:

“He called that place Bethel, though the city used to be called Luz (28:19),” the same Luz as in, “Jacob said to Joseph, ‘God Almighty appeared to me at Luz in the land of Canaan, and there He blessed me’ (48:3),” Jacob reverts to its original name Luz, “The land of Eternal Life.” (Bereishit Rabbah 69:7; Zohar I, Toledot, II, Terumah) rather than the name he gave the city, Bethel.

Something happened at Luz-Bethel, something that led Jacob to, “lift(ed) his feet, and went toward the land of the people of the east (29:1),” (“Rock and Bust“) as in, “He stationed at the east of the Garden of Eden the Cherubim and the flame of the ever-turning sword, to guard the way to the Tree of Life (3:24),” (Eichah & Tisha B’Av Part One) and as did Cain, who, “left the presence of the Lord and settled in the land of Nod, east of Eden (6:16).”

Jacob travelled in the opposite direction of the Tower of Babel builders, who, “When they migrated from the east (11:1).”

Jacob experiences the Land of Eternal Life, and sets out to reverse the steps taken by Adam, Cain, and the Tower, away from Eden and the Tree of Life.

“And Jacob lived,” “Vayechi,” is the story of a man who lived every moment of his life, even in death and after!

And there’s (much) more…

Author Info:
Learn & discover the Divine prophecies with Rabbi Simcha Weinberg from the holy Torah, Jewish Law, Mysticism, Kabbalah and Jewish Prophecies. The Foundation Stone™ is the ultimate resource for Jews, Judaism, Jewish Education, Jewish Spirituality & the holy Torah.

“The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives fully is prepared to die at any time (Mark Twain).”

“Jacob lived in Egypt seventeen years, and the years of his life were a hundred and forty-seven. When the time drew near for Israel to die, he called for his son Joseph and said to him, ‘If I have found favor in your eyes, put your hand under my thigh and promise that you will show me kindness and faithfulness. Do not bury me in Egypt, but when I rest with my fathers, carry me out of Egypt and bury me where they are buried’ (Genesis 47:28-30).”

So the man we who was introduced to us as a “Wholesome and a Tent Dweller (25:27), now lives in, of all places, Egypt.

The man whose first direct taste of the power of death in defining life (Rashi, 25:32) was on the day his grandfather, Abraham died (Rashi, 25:30), when his brother said, “Look, I am going to die, so of what use to me is a birthright?”, now faces his own death.

He addresses some practical issues, and then, allows Joseph to return home. His “time drawing near to die,” doesn’t define his living his final days! Finally, “Some time later Joseph was told, ‘Your father is ill.’ So he took his two sons Manasseh and Ephraim along with him. When Jacob was told, ‘Your son Joseph has come to you,’ Israel rallied his strength and sat up on the bed.

Jacob said to Joseph, “God Almighty appeared to me at Luz in the land of Canaan, and there He blessed me and said to me, ‘I am going to make you fruitful and increase your numbers. I will make you a community of peoples, and I will give this land as an everlasting possession to your descendants after you.’

‘Now then, your two sons born to you in Egypt before I came to you here will be reckoned as mine; Ephraim and Manasseh will be mine, just as Reuben and Simeon are mine’ (48:1-5).”

Esau, at a young age, because of the eventuality of death, spurned the birthright, but Jacob, doesn’t address the issue of the birthright he will gift to Joseph until his final mortal illness. He doesn’t even address the issue when asking Joseph to supervise all the funeral arrangements, which would have been a good negotiating tactic – “I am giving the birthright to you, so can you please make sure I will be buried in Hebron?” – he waits until Joseph comes to him to bid farewell, his final moments, to discuss the birthright.

One brother shapes his destiny early on because of his fear of death, while the other waits until the very end to speak of it.

The first major event on Jacob’s life was shaped by another facing death. The next major event, too, the theft of the blessing, was also shaped by another’s approach to death:

“When Isaac was old and his eyes were so weak that he could no longer see, he called for Esau his older son and said to him, ‘My son.’

“Here I am,’ he answered.

Isaac said, ‘I am now an old man and don’t know the day of my death. Now then, get your equipment—your quiver and bow—and go out to the open country to hunt some wild game for me. Prepare me the kind of tasty food I like and bring it to me to eat, so that I may give you my blessing before I die’ (27:1-4).”

That experience ends with another mention of Esau thinking of death, “The days of mourning for my father are near; then I will kill my brother Jacob (Verse 41),” leads to yet another person thinking of death, Rebecca: “Now then, my son, do what I say: Flee at once to my brother Laban in Haran. Stay with him for a while until your brother’s fury subsides. When your brother is no longer angry with you and forgets what you did to him, I’ll send word for you to come back from there. Why should I lose both of you in one day’ (43-45).”

The groundwork is now prepared for the next major event on Jacob’s life, again by considerations of death!

“Then Rebecca said to Isaac, ‘I’m disgusted with living because of these Hittite women. If Jacob takes a wife from among the women of this land, from Hittite women like these, my life will not be worth living’ (46).”

Now that I think about it, the first major event in Jacob’s life, his birth, also had some discussion of death: “The babies jostled each other within her, and she said, ‘If it is such; why must I be’ (25:22).”

Isaac, hearing Rebecca’s concerns with the meaning of life, uses the opportunity to officially give Jacob the birthright! “So Isaac called for Jacob and blessed him. Then he commanded him: ‘Do not marry a Canaanite woman. Go at once to Paddan Aram, to the house of your mother’s father Bethuel. Take a wife for yourself there, from among the daughters of Laban, your mother’s brother. May God Almighty bless you and make you fruitful and increase your numbers until you become a community of peoples.  May He give you and your descendants the blessing given to Abraham, so that you may take possession of the land where you now reside as a foreigner, the land God gave to Abraham.’ Then Isaac sent Jacob on his way, and he went to Paddan Aram, to Laban son of Bethuel the Aramean, the brother of Rebecca, who was the mother of Jacob and Esau (28:1-5).”

Isaac’s words sound so familiar; we heard them all before in Chayei Sarah, the portion that dealt with Sarah’s death and burial!

“Abraham was now very old, (another “death” consideration)

and God had blessed him in every way.

He said to the senior servant in his household, the one in charge of all that he had, ‘Put your hand under my thigh.” [Sound familiar: Jacob’s words to Joseph at the beginning of the portion: ‘Put your hand under my thigh.’]
I want you to swear by God, the Lord of heaven and the Lord of earth, that you will not get a wife for my son from the daughters of the Canaanites, among whom I am living, [Isaac’s words to Jacob.]

but will go to my country and my own relatives and get a wife for my son Isaac.’

So the servant put his hand under the thigh of his master Abraham and swore an oath to him concerning this matter (Chapter 24).”



Isaac and Rebecca’s relationship was shaped by death: “Isaac brought her into the tent of his mother Sarah, and he married Rebecca. So she became his wife, and he loved her; and Isaac was comforted after his mother’s death (24:67).”

God was dead serious when He said to Adam, “You must surely eat from any tree in the garden; but you must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat from it you will certainly die (2:16-17).” The Serpent certainly picked up on this being a huge issue:

“The woman said to the serpent, ‘We may eat fruit from the trees in the garden, but the Lord did say, ‘You must not eat fruit from the tree that is in the middle of the garden, and you must not touch it, or you will die.’

‘You will not certainly die,’ the serpent said to the woman. ‘For the Lord knows that when you eat from it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like powers, knowing good and evil’ (3:2-5).”

Oh no! Weinberg! Eden again?!

Yup! Let’s see why… With a slight detour or two on the way…

Author Info:
Learn & discover the Divine prophecies with Rabbi Simcha Weinberg from the holy Torah, Jewish Law, Mysticism, Kabbalah and Jewish Prophecies. The Foundation Stone™ is the ultimate resource for Jews, Judaism, Jewish Education, Jewish Spirituality & the holy Torah.