The Dance of Tu B’Av: Shedding

Aug 15th, 2011 by Rabbi Simcha Weinberg in Holidays, Relationships

Self Discovery

Debbie has an interesting understanding of the borrowed clothing of the Tu B’Av dance: One of the most important stages of marriage is being able to shed certain self-perceptions ingrained from childhood and school, and learn to see ourselves as our spouse sees us, and grow into our own skin. The borrowed clothes are the Sages’ reminder that the clothes we wear when we first marry are borrowed; they are perceptions ingrained from the past that must be shed as we enter marriage which can help us discover ourselves.

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  • Very nice idea – here is an example of a great Jewish marriage and how it was started and matured…

    Yishai and Malkah Fleisher talk about their wedding in Hevron, Israel outside the Cave of the Patriarchs where Abraham and Sarah are buried. This special footage is part of a new documentary on the historic city of Hevron being made by 972 Media. Eye On Zion Media thanks our friends at 972 Media for sharing this wonderful new footage with us. To see more of their on-going work on the documentary visit

  • moshe stepansky

    In honor of my Holy Rebbitzen,Shira, on the occasion of our 20th wedding anniversary on the cusp of TU b’Av,I’d like to suggest a different take on the borrowed clothes.

    By wearing borrowed clothes each prospective bride transmits the following message to her prospective soulmate:
    “I’m desperately searching for that person with whom together we can reach the level of Odom and Khava BEFORE the Kheit, the misdeed of the Tree of Knowledge.”

    It was only AFTER the Fall that G-d made Cotnote Ohr,Garments of Skin/Light, for Odom and Khava==> That means beforehand they did not have their own garments.

    Seeking one’s soulmate, therefore, must sharpen one’s focus on their own, and others’ ESSENCE, and relegate only secondary importance to the L’voosh, the cloaking devices.


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